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Want to know what the future has in store? No seriously, would you like to know how this world plays out? Now you might be thinking to yourself “nobody can predict the future,” and my reply to this is that you’re right! Or so I thought. I am going to let you in on a little secret that as of November 2009, I didn’t think was possible. Expand your mind and open your ears… er eyes. Meet Rubix.
The room was cold and sterile. Rubix hadn’t eaten for days, and the thought of a Bestmart burger started to sound appealing, which is disturbing on its own accord. Rubix heard an employee dancing down the hall, in the distance he was singing “rain drops are falling on my head” and drooling simultaneously.
This time was different though, and Rubix knew he would be escaping the clutches of this evil monopoly conglomerate corporation tonight. Being the smartest monkey in the world, thanks to the Bestmart scientists, he had a plan that would mean his freedom, and possibly ours. Knowing the way things were going for the future of our world, he waited…until.
The employee turned the latch and just like Rubix imagined so many times in his mind, he sprung out from the cage and ran as fast as he could towards the top secret doors of the Bestmart Labs. Slowly he crept into the box that he had heard so much talk of and as he closed the lid, fully aware of the box’s secrets, it would be the last time he would see his reality, and hopefully that awful conglomerate Bestmart.
It was so dark in that box, that once he saw light again it felt like an eternity had flown by. Nervous little monkey by his extensive calculations expected to find maybe a few employees of Bestmart, but his expectations were thrown for a loop when he saw that no one was wearing those blue smocks. Confident that it was safe to come out, Rubix climbed out of the box, and dragged it behind some dumpsters for safe keeping.
Now here’s the part that we come in. We found Rubix wondering Hamilton Mountain aimelessly, and being the people we are, decided that we should bring him home before animal aid caught up to him. On the car ride though we were caught by surprise when the words….”What year is this?” were spoken clearly and not from our mouths.
To make a long story short, we eventually came to an understanding that if this monkey could talk, he must be from the future like he claims. It was only a matter of time before we made it our life mission to help him as well as our world’s future.
Here is how we understand the future to be: Everyone is an employee of Bestmart, and every product that’s made is made by them. Small businesses became obsolete during the turn of our century, because of two factors, the economic bust, which bankrupted 92% of small businesses, and the lack of marketing, and branding for the other 8%. Obviously this was a disaster so Rubix with his amazing abilities imparted the knowledge and secrets to ensure that small businesses rule once more. Thus he created Serious Monkey, and we are happy to be a part of this pre-emptive measure to change the future for Rubix and all of us.